What Are You Hungry For?

I’ve always loved food.

As a kid, my appetite was something I wore like a badge of honor. I wasn’t a picky eater. My parents were happy to exclaim that I ate whatever was put before me. I cleaned my plate always, went back for seconds, and never shied away from the table when visitors dropped in, and we had a lot of visitors.

Food made me feel welcomed and safe. It brought comfort, celebration, and connection. I ate when I was happy, but I also ate when I felt lonely, stressed, or sad. I rarely lost my appetite. Even now, I know I can get “hangry” if I skip meals.

But there’s this one incident with food that's etched vividly in my memory. It was a day like any other. I had returned home after visiting my bed-ridden dad who was struggling with Parkinson's Disease. We had been walking this journey with him for years and it was often a source of emotional strain. Nothing extremely different happened that day. I felt sad, as I often did after a visit. So I went to the kitchen in search of some comfort food. I felt hungry.

This particular evening there was a gnawing, an ache even, in my stomach. The sensation was stronger than usual. I stood at the kitchen counter, reaching for anything and everything I could get my hands on to satisfy. I kept thinking, nothing is hitting the spot.

So I kept reaching for something more in search of satisfaction. It was the strangest feeling. Sure, I had hunger pangs lots of times. But I had never experienced a sensation quite like. It was so odd because the feeling of hunger would not subside. I even said to my husband, "I'm eating, but I still feel hungry, it's like there's a hole in my belly and it wont fill up." Then it dawned on me. The sensation I was feeling wasn't hunger. It was an emotional response that physiologically mimicked hunger.

Then I left the kitchen, with it's limited ability to comfort me, and sat with my husband who brought me the emotional support I needed. That was the first time I truly recognized that the sensation I experienced wasn’t physical hungry. I was emotionally starving for comfort in a difficult season.

Since then I have been learning to ask myself: “What am I really hungry for?”

Sometimes it’s connection. Sometimes rest. Sometimes it’s just stillness. And honestly? Sometimes it’s just a craving for salt and crunch — hello, potato chips — but that type of craving is a topic for another day.

But I have learned that when it comes to hunger, it's best to pause and listen to what my body is telling me. I need to be able to differentiate between physical hunger, emotional hunger, and even spiritual hunger. The sensations feel similar and we can easily confuse the source of our feelings. In our noisy world of activity and distraction we seldom stop long enough to really pay attention to what our bodies are screaming to tell us. I don't always get it right, but I’m getting better at telling the difference.

So to help me in this process here are a few small habits I’m working on:

• Slow down. Chew. Breathe. Be present.

• Be grateful. Gratitude grounds you and prepares your body to receive.

• Watch portions. Use a physical guide if you need help (Watch 2 min tip here).

• Eat with people. Food is about more than fuel — it’s about connection.

• Name your emotions. Are you really hungry — or hungry for something else? I've linked a food journal here

This isn’t easy. It’s a steep and emotional learning curve. But I believe that healing begins when we start listening to our bodies — and listening to God who created them.

Your body is talking to you. What is it saying?

If deep emotions come up, don’t be afraid to feel them. They will help you identify where you need to go for help. Ask for help — from a trusted friend, a counselor, from God himself. He knows what you need, and He’ll meet you in that place of hunger with the kind of nourishment that leaves you truly full.

"Eat to fuel your body not to feed your emotions."

Would you like more inspirational wellness content delivered to your email each month? Subscribe to my monthly newsletter, "Your Monthly Wellness Boost"